对不起，如果我让你们失望了。今天，眼泪又再折磨我。心里的难过和担忧真的不能不去想，我好后悔，真的好后悔，为什么我每次都那么不怕死。打电话跟哥哥发泄，懊恼自己，为什么没认真对待，为什么每次事情发生了，我才懂得怕。哭肿了双眼，哽咽地告诉他未来一切都会不一样，如果我失败。我好辛苦，我不想再继续，我可不可以就到这里停下，我不想再承受那些压力，压逼得我好痛苦


如果我真的失败，我知道这是我得到的报应。

奇迹可不可以出现，我不想抱着担忧的心情过日子。

今晚，就让我痛哭好吗？对不起，我不是故意再你面前哭，我只是控制不住。折磨了3年到现在都还没结束，我恨你，为什么要给我那些东西，是要给我留恋吗？还是要我每次看到会想起你？你的承诺，到现在我都还忘不掉，全都是空头承诺。已经折腾了那么久，我好累。

Sorrowfully

Self-blaming after programming test. Why didn't study well before the test,why am i so slow-thinking to answer the questions. I've regretted what i did.

Called my mum and cried on phone,i know that's no excuses to cried for but,this is the only way i could expressed. It's not hard to find excuses to forgive myself,but i could't do it. I don't have the qualification to do so.

"Let it be the lesson,now you've to do is focus on your final paper and strive marks at there",he said.

Will always get comfort after talked with elder bro. Kor, thanks for encouraged,he's the man that always can calm,console me. The man i love talk to!

I have to work harder and harder,this is the last happened i told myself. To succeed,i must learn to overcome obstacles. I only hope i could pass the sem and able to pursue my PR course later.

night.

Guilty 99

Just back from supper with friends. First round we went to mamak. I ordered bihun goreng and teh tarik. After sit for one hour and half,yee and fatty want get some snacks,then we went to 7 eleven "shop" around. "Shop" kinda long there,because they choose snacks and biscuits like choose vegetable in pasar. i just stand beside and listened them recommended which snacks is "hao chi" -.-

Plan to go home after that. Walked till half way,saw the "lok lok" car still there,haven't close. Automatically,there is our second round. i ate 3 cucuk of lok lok,that's much more enough for me since a plate of bihun already grab inside my stomach :X

Have the guilty feeling while walking back hostel. The main reason why i can't slim down. :/

tomorrow have to go jogging,i duwan take supper anymore.Hope i can do it,maybe?　lol

my blog is still alive,please forgive my laziness :@@

开始怀疑自己是不是已经19岁

为什么我还能那么幼稚的去发脾气

我既然去怨我哥哥，怒骂他是个自私的人

我还对着我爸妈讲电话时发脾气

妈好声好气跟我谈，哄我，我还嫌他们偏帮，盖他的电话

到最后，自己却哭了起来

对不起，我对我幼稚的行为感到很抱歉，我当时真的无法控制自己的情绪，对不起。

脑袋闪过好多你之前多我说过的话。我以为我变了，变得更坚强，更懂事，可是原来这两年来我都没改变，我还是以前的那个我，那个一点都不成熟的我。

这几天晚上，我都被眼泪折腾了，才睡着。你曾说和牛奶能帮助入睡，原来这真的是心理作用。

昨晚，我一直在等你的祝福，到现在我都还在等。曾经付出的真心，到最后只换来泪跟痛。

Anti-study

BOO! i'm so lazy to study now! Test is coming soon,and me still spent most of the hours in front of computer. I felt guilty. Just now i was trying do some math questions,but i was stuck in half way. Do until siao,damn beh song :@ anyone can teach me? i really regret why didn't pay attention during lecture class. I need someone to guide me now :(

Eating 麦芽糖 that given by yeehong. It's nice but imba sticky! :3

Going to continue reading my novel,just left few pages :D

I promised after finish reading,i'll study! :/